Omotayo Joloasho

 

 

Home in Pieces

About three days upon my arrival in Nigeria, I was conversing with a friend, and he asked me if I had any trouble at the airport. I told him how surprised I was that I didn't, since so many people had warned me of the potential for trouble. "Those customs officers are very keen,” he said. “They know who's who. They probably looked at you, saw your passport and knew that this one is not a Nigerian. I mean, her passport says she's Nigerian, but she's not really a Nigerian."

Honestly, his statement hurt. In all my years of being away, I took the greatest pride in proclaiming my native country. In everything I did, I wanted to represent Nigeria; it strengthened my identity. Living in America, I am not fully American. Considering myself Nigerian, I always
knew that it would take going back home to reclaim my true self, for pieces of me to be made whole. So to be told that evasive phrase, that I was Nigerian but not a Nigerian, put me back in an uncertain territory as to the source of my identity.

The more time I spend in Nigeria, the more the truth of my friend's statement rings. I don't feel fully at home here. The bulk of my time I spend waiting to go back to America to resume that life I'm used to, with the freedom to explore my interests. It's really ironic but back in America,
struggling to reclaim Nigeria, I became very interested in Yoruba traditional religion, the spiritual practice of my tribe. I expected that through my visit to Nigeria, I could gain a more authentic access to this practice. Yet I did not because my family, like many in Nigeria, is staunchly Christian. My mum rejects native religion and expects me to do the same.

I have always blamed colonialism for disrupting the flow of cultures and native traditions. Rather than in villages and communal compounds, we now live in underdeveloped cities adopting urban coping methods in place of native traditions. Had missionaries not started the chain of conversion to Christianity, the anger my mother expresses at my interest in our tribal religion would not be there. I have felt justified in placing blame, but find now that as a result of contradictions, I no longer can. By being in Nigeria, I am experiencing more and more that culture by its very nature is dynamic and ever changing. So perhaps the colonial experience and everything after is not an interruption or disruption but rather proof of that dynamic and ever changing aspect of culture. If this is true, then where does the struggle lie?

Across the African Diaspora, is the incompleteness of our lives today truly a case of modernity and cultures, being dynamic, changing with the times? Or are we losing our culture and parts of ourselves? Are we submitting our ways of life to a colonialist/homogenous/imperialist definition of humanity? Have we lost home?

The result of going home has become much like Eman's from Wole Soyinka's play, The Strong Breed, who said- "This, after all, is what I sought. It was here all the time. And I threw away the part of me that was formed in strange places. I made a home in my birthplace." To claim a home in my native land, I would have to sacrifice those parts of me formed in the “strange place” that is America. I took it for granted that going back to Nigeria would make me whole, but arrived to realize that Nigeria only wants me in pieces. Despite the journey, perhaps because of it, home evades me.

In this flux, I find comfort in Wole Soyinka. He writes Yoruba culture in a way that not only speaks to Yorubas, but also invites in those that are not. He fuses cultural elements of the colonialist and the colonized in a way that gets beyond these labels to the heart of our humanity. His vision of mankind is a holistic one. Reminded of him, I am inspired as I work to reconcile with history and face the present without blame, shame or guilt. I want to be human in every sense of the word. As such, I work to claim as my home the whole earth.

 

 

WELLSPRING OF MY SOUL

Characters Represented:

GRACE	a dark slave
DORCAS	her mulatto sister
JESSE	Grace's son
MASSA	their master
LUKE	Massa's son
RUFUS	overseer
RICKYDOC	a visiting conjurer

OTHER SLAVES

Time: Five days in the Summer of 1839, each scene is a new day.

Place: Massa's Plantation

Setting: There are two sides to Massa's plantation. On one side, the big house, a white mansion, with flowered pathways. On the other side the slave quarters, adjoined wooden shacks in terrible condition, some have dried-out “gardens. Behind and around the slave quarters are dense woods. Between the big house and slave quarters, there is a well, which is the navel of the plantation. Hanging above the well is the plantation bell. A little distance from the well is a willow tree with ropes tied around its trunk and a few rope strands hanging from its higher branches.

ACT ONE
SCENE 1
DAY 1-MASSA MEANS BUSINESS
BLACKOUT
(A deep-sounding bell rings. Lights up to reveal the yard. It's past sunset, moving towards deep night. At this time the yard is deserted. Enter JESSE from the woods. He's 12 and awkwardly lanky. Moving seemingly without purpose, He goes to the well, and begins pacing. He has a troubled countenance.)

JESSE
He say we'se gon' be free…what is this free…ain't I already free...but no, he say I'se a slave…massa…owns…me… he say massa owns ma mamma and anty dorcas, and naleek, and billy, and all us, say she owns us like we was chickens or some'in…I'se a slave like a chicken…but he say we'se gotta fight that we men, that massa don't believe it but that men, that we can only be men if we say we're men, and take our manhood else we ain't never gon' be free…but what is this free!?! why I gotta fight…I don't wan' fight nobody…massa's real nice, she don't treat me like no chicken…so maybe I ain't… say we tied down, SHACKLED! say we still--

(As JESSE paces, RICKYDOC appears under the willow tree. He wears a feather for an earring, is bare-chested, but wearing a skirt, and is barefooted. He carries a wooden staff, which bears carvings of figures and godheads. He leans on the staff for support as he dances with much jubilation around the willow tree, a jubilation that, although fits well with RICKYDOC, doesn't quite belong in the mood of the scene. Drumming accompanies every movement he makes. The rhythm is a fast wild one, the kind that makes one kick out fists and legs in the air without care. JESSE is oblivious to RICKYDOC and everything that accompanies the elder. Yet the drumming is there and JESSE speaks on without missing a beat.)

JESSE (CONT'D)
--chil'ren…say Massa keep us chil'ren and she keep us from knowing truth…say truth is…what? what I gotta fight for-

GRACE

(O.S. Singing)
O, Satan is a liar and he conjure too
And if you don't mind he'll conjure you
So blow your trumpet Gabriel…

(Juxtaposed with the drumming, GRACE'S singing is quite jarring and throws off the rhythm of JESSE'S speech.)

JESSE
…aw, naw that's mummy, she gon' wan' know where I been and I cain't tell her.

(He looks around for a place to hide. He sees the willow tree, but he does not see RICKYDOC, who has danced his way up the tree and is now sitting on its branches with a drum between his legs that had not been there before. JESSE runs to hide behind the tree. A few moments later, enter GRACE from one of the few slave cabins closest to the big house. She is preceded by her beautiful melodic voice, which has the quality of soothing the soul like water. Indeed, she is carrying three buckets for water at the well. She is wearing a headwrap, her attire is tidy. A chipper older woman, she puts her soul into the song finding refuge in the words.

GRACE
(Singing)

Sinner, please don't let this harvest pass
sinner please don't let this harvest pass
sinner please don't let this harvest pass
and die and lose your soul alas, etc

(RICKYDOC, off in his own world, has taken charge of the drumming. He is beating an even faster rhythm than before, a rhythm which inspires one to somersault, and make other reckless movements. GRACE'S singing in combination with RICKYDOC'S drumming is not in synch. It is interesting but quite jarring to the ears and to the body.)

Moment.

(There is a rustle in the woods, GRACE is startled, she turns around and around searching for the source of the sound, she can't identify it, so she goes back to cleaning her buckets, alert and no longer singing. The drumming fades, RICKYDOC disappears. Enter DORCAS from the woods, in a direction opposite Jesse's entrance. She is wildly disheveled, with twigs in her hair, and a muddy skirt. There are traces of blood at the back of her blouse that come together in the rhythm of fire. Juxtaposed with DORCAS, GRACE is a mouse.)

DORCAS
(walking menacingly)
I see miss high and mighty takes it upon herself to descend on us common folks

GRACE
(turning to see her, relieved)
... don't be sneaking up on a gal like that, you almos' scared me (pause) you miss meetin' t'day. what you doin' hanging round in the woods? (she looks up to see that it's a clear sky with so many stars) you warn't tryin'a …was you?

DORCAS
I had a good mind notta go ta meeting…you know I cain't stand for those things

GRACE
now why you gon' be so disagreeable like that, you know God is our only salvation

DORCAS
Gracie, you tell me what kinda salvation is God taking us from our first home, our true home, and placing us in their land, forever dependant on their kindness and at the mercy of their disposition. If Massa's happy, we'se happy, when Massa's sad, lawd, we might as well all go ta hell. you tell me what kinda salvation is waking up before sunrise like we do to go plow they fields while you house folks rush into they kitchen and baths to clean up house so they can wake up to sunny wispy clean, you tell me what kinda salvation is them treating us like animals, with brands like cattle, padlocks and mouth pieces like goats, we bear the brunt of the whip like they horses even worse, and on top of that, they deny us our minds, they deny us books and words that will feed our future and quench our thirst for truth --

GRACE
Baby D, don't start again with them books and words. better be real careful, you know they'll KILL somebody, they find out they reading!

DORCAS
-- and you come back to me, dear sista, telling me that God, their God, is our only salvation? you sold your soul!

GRACE
(sucks her teeth) ain't even gon play this. I heard you got whipped t'day, cain't say I'se surprise, you difficult. the way you going on, better be careful MASSA don't hear you, she kill you for sho!

DORCAS
I don't care about that witch. do you know she came to my room this morning and told me ta shack up with Timmy? I told her I warn't shacking up with Timmy, that good for nothing low life, and she told me Timmy is “good and strong and you'se good and strong, and both y'all gon' have some good and strong children.” She says she keep me around cause I was strong and bear children. I ain't difficult. I do what I have ta.(pause.)

GRACE
I jes saying, maybe if you do what Massa says --

DORCAS
I THINK (quietly) you cain't tell me what to do no more. since when you turned your back on me. I told massa I warn't shacking up with Timmy, told her I didn't love him

GRACE
(shocked) no you didn't. (beat) D, I'in't turn my back on you, I do what I gots ta, jes lak you.

DORCAS
hmm hmm. Folks is talking you know. You acting more high and mighty now more than ever. you cozy right up there with'em?

GRACE
Baby D, you ain't never been one to listen to them folks talk. And if you member, I got this high and mighty, lak you call it, from you, and I 'member correctly your mama did the same thing. You jes mad cause I'm up there in the big house and YOU ain't no mo. Now, D, you know better 'an talk lak that lak Love in Massa's face

DORCAS
(dimly) She's your mama too, don't be pushing her on me. (pause) Jesse misses you, you know. He needs you now more than ever, but you just too proud to give yourself to him, that or too blind, you rather give your soul to whitefolks than to your own son

GRACE
You do it too. YOU KNOW it's what we gotta do around here to have any-

DORCAS
I NEVER COZY UP TO NO WHITEFOLK. NEVER

GRACE
thas a lie cause I seem to member you and one young Massa Luke getting good and cozy together 'fore his mama sent him away. He's b --

DORCAS
that was a long time ago. Five harvests have passed since that happened, and you promised me you would never again bring that up. And you still don't understand. It was different between Luke and me. Luke's different.

GRACE
I don't see how different. You was using him jes like he was using you. the coat you got that winter, how “cozy” did y'all get for you to get that huh

DORCAS
You better go, Massa won't like you dirtying yourself with us field hands. you jes talking your nonsense talk anyway.

GRACE
You can't tell me what I gots to do. You don't own me

DORCAS
Yeah, Massa does, and you still selling yourself ta-

GRACE
I jes sayin' it'll go a li'l easier fo you if you jes do what she says and keep yo mouth shut

DORCAS
well, it's too late now. you know what she did? (suppressing anger, she has a balled fist) she said who tole you 'bout love? and I didn't say nothing. and she said, well ah, love ain't for your people, you cain't understand it, all you're good for is your work, and then she laughs, that dirty old spiteful witch, and she said ta get ta Timmy's shack else she whip me, and I quietly told her no, I'm not going to Timmy, I don't love him. Gracie, inside my mind I was screaming I'M NOT A BREEDER, I'M A HUMAN BEING AND I BELIEVE IN LOVE!!!

GRACE
aw naw, Baby D, did you tell her that?

DORCAS
How stupid you think I am?

GRACE
(jestfully)
well, you'se the one who tol massa she'in't “Love” Timmy. Tell me who do you love? He's back y'know, he-

DORCAS
Gracie, she whipped me, in front of all em other field hands to-

GRACE
I ain't surprised, you shoulda known better

DORCAS
(with conviction)
Known better? She whipped me Gracie.

GRACE
chil' dat ain't nothing… jes hold your tongue

DORCAS
hold your tongue…Gracie, that ain't fair…if I was singing praises to your God, and stomping and making out like you do at prayer meeting, would you tell me ta hold ma tongue? anywho, you my sista, not mama, you should be telling Jessie this now, not me

GRACE
my son is my bus-

DORCAS
THAT'S A LIE. He ain't your son… I been more of a mother to that boy since the night he was born and you know it

GRACE
Don't you start with that!!! you think I'in't wantta be there with him, you think I want you to be with my son, my only son!? You bad for him! With all your “we're tha mercy o' they position and penning o' they kindness” shit. I'on't want you passing that to my son! Did you think I wanted you to nurse him all those days I was in that house taking care o' her kids when all I wanted was to hold ma own? but massa wanted me ta get back ta her fam'ley and you was-

DORCAS
and of course we always do what massa says.

GRACE
What do you want me to do? You know we don't have no choice

DORCAS
You have a choice. when it comes to Jesse. You have to let him see our world, the way it is, not with all'em lies you make up, he's old now, he ain't gone believe that no more, I can't go long with this no more, he gonna want the truth, you gotta tell him

GRACE
I ain't gonna. he too young…

DORCAS
child, you delude yourself. He's gon find out somehow…better it be from your mouth than somebody else's. Tell him the truth Grace, tell him he ain't nothing but a go-

GRACE
That's enough!

DORCAS
Well, he is, ain't he? You need to break that boy Gracie, he getting too restless, and if you don't do it, massa or one a' her folks'll do it

GRACE
(emphatically)
no

DORCAS
break him, Gracie. do you even know where he is right now?

GRACE
(slowly, between clenched teeth)
I ain't gon' break my son. I'se going to give him tha world, not like it is now, but a world thas good, and he cain stay safe.

DORCAS
Jes cause you mad at Mama, don't mean you ain't got to do right by yo son. Mama knew the truth and she worked with it, she never lied to us, she knew she ain't got nothing to give us just like you ain't got nothing for Jesse but you keep him from the truth and it ain't gon' get you nowhere.

GRACE
Mama's dead Dorcas. She being dead, why won't ya jes leave her be? Daddy was a better man. All her roamings about, he jes took it in, he took it all inside, never said a word. He died tryingna protate her honer.

DORCAS
What you mean? (No response) Mama always sed, he died of natural causes. (No response. Smacks teeth) You ain't been fair to her...

GRACE
You ALWAYS ON HER SIDE!!! (with conviction) There's somethings you don't know, and I cain't tell you... But know this Dorcas. Whitefolks can kill and I ain't letting you kill my son. Tha more he away from they world, tha better it is, and he can live.

DORCAS
that boy ain't too young to be getting whipped and he's lucky I been looking out for him so far…you know I love him like my own, wouldn't be saying this if I didn't. (final, pausing between each word.) break. him. Gracie.

GRACE
Sista, I'm a' break you if you don't-

DORCAS
you can't break me

GRACE
thas right, you too stubborn. they whipping you and you still cain't catch the sense to do what they say-

DORCAS
and you know what, there's a part of me that they'll never get to, I'm saving that part for-

GRACE
What's wrong with Timmy? He's your own. Timmy is a good man, nice, he b'lieve in god, he clean, he ain't like those field-

DORCAS
Gracie, I can't live without love.

GRACE
you pick at my stomach sometimes. how many times I gotta say this to you, love ain't. for our kind, there ain't no sech thing, ya better be satisfied with your'n and stay...

DORCAS
Cause they say so? what do they know, they stupid, crack...

GRACE
D shush! (whispering)Rufus is coming. (louder now) the Bible says slave obey your massa, now if massa want you to be with ol' Tim, you hafta truss her to know what's good for ya. God put'em over us for a reason Dorcas, and we should obey God-

(Enter Rufus)

GRACE (CONT'D)
ev'ning overseer Rufus.

RUFUS
what y'all niggras doing out here?

GRACE
we'se drawing some water overseer

RUFUS
well get it quick and go, it's pas curfew, I don't want to see you here, when I come back

GRACE
right-o overseer, you ain't never been right-er (Rufus grunts, proceeds to the well to get some water).

GRACE (Cont'd)
I'se jes telling ma sista here how we should obey God will in all things under the...

(Rufus grunts, exits.)

DORCAS
That was a good one Gracie

GRACE
you think I'se joking. I'se serious. I'se don't know what I'se do without ma poor massa, aw lawd! I'se just wouldn't know how ta be, I'se just wouldn't feel right if I didn't get ma whippings every day, and if I didn't have overseer Rufus in the field, making sure I do my work, aw lawd! cause I'se a lazy good-for-nothing, and I need overseer ta make sure I do my work, I just be no good without my massa, my poor massa, I'se just be no good (they both crack up with serious laughter. Pause. laughter dies down.)

DORCAS
What are you gonna do about Jesse?

GRACE
What are you gonna do about Tim?

DORCAS
what am I supposed to do about Tim? I already told you, I ain't goin with 'im.

GRACE
Chile, massa means business, when she wants some kids, she wants some kids. and she's gon get it if she has ta tie you down-so you better be smart. just do what she says, and avoid them whippings. tell her she's right, that you don't know what love is, it will make her feel good, and Jessie can have a-

DORCAS
I'm not going to be with the man. let it go

GRACE
Alright Chile, jes don't say I'in't warn you, you been lucky so far, ain't no body take you 'ginst you will, but don't come back to me when...

DORCAS
Worry about Jesse, don't worry about me.

(they exit for the slave quarters, GRACE carrying a bucket of water in each hand, and DORCAS carrying the third one.)

DORCAS (CONT'D)
I'm serious about that child.
(Moment.)
(Jesse comes out from hiding. He's heard and seen everything.)

JESSE
(disoriented)
so he right. man, it's all true. massa whoop anty dorcas…that's why she be crying and I ast her what wrong, and she won't say nothing, aw man, I gotta do something…I gotta do something… I hafta save her…we tied down like animals anty Dorcas sed, like horses and cattle, what's cattle?…I'm a man…I hafta free…free…all us…free…I gotta do something…save us… free… something… free…free (he begins to stumble off into the woods. RICKYDOC appears in front of him. He speaks with a Yoruba accent.)

JESSE
Oh you again.

RICKYDOC
I am Rickydoc, son of the wind daughter of the sun, thundersto-

JESSE
you 'ready told me all-at, old man. I need you to help me

RICKYDOC
(quick excited slyness) what you gon do?

JESSE
I'on know

RICKYDOC
(sly)
Oh I know, what you gon do.

JESSE
(Suspicious)
how you know

RICKYDOC
I know what you think fore you think it boi. it's de ifa way. You young, you like an open book, but you learn.

JESSE
you help me then? sence you know and I...

RICKYDOC
boi! respect your elders. that's the only way you get tru-

JESSE
I res...

RICKYDOC
stop! interrupting boi. what kinda way to show respect is dat. you think you know everything now! Just cause I let you see a little trutt! dat is nothing! you have yet to learn the real...

JESSE
Look old ma..
(Rickydoc hits him on the head with his staff)

JESSE (CONT'D)
ow!

RICKYDOC
Patience my son! But you learn. For what you gone do, you need dis… (getting into his mojo, he shows JESSE roots and herbs) cain't nobody see you if you got dis. You be invisible You gots to eat it just so

(He shows JESSE ritual of eating the dirt)

JESSE
I ain't-
(RICKYDOC tries to hit JESSE again. JESSE catches the cane before it hits him)

JESSE (CONT”D)
Naw, you won't get me this time

RICKYDOC
You trying me boi. (releases his staff from JESSE'S grip) You young today. ah! in my day, men walked with gods and were gods because dey...(JESSE grabs the roots and herbs from the floor where Rickydoc had put it.)

JESSE
Look old man, you ain't lying about this stuff, is you? Cause my mummy lied to me a lot, and I can't take no lies no more. Now I think I know what I wanna do, so tell me, is you lying?

RICKYDOC
I am Ricydoc, son of the wind, daughter of the sun, I do not lie, only trutt comes out from dese two lips, Shango smite me down de day de night one lie comes out of dis lips, Obatala swaddle me deep into de earth till I can pass air no more, Oya-mi, my mother, even you, blow me from the land...

(JESSE takes off running into the woods with the roots and herbs.)

JESSE
Thank you old man. I gots to do something. can't stand around talking and doing nothing. I gots to do, you understand

RICKYDOC
-Let no words again come out from dese two lips de day I tell lie. (laughs, pointing in Jesse's direction) he tinks he can (laughs) you can't fault him doe, poor boi. at least he earnest, trying to do someting, but patience. (sucks teeth) poor boi. he learn. (pause, looks out to the audience) I know you out dere. I know you watching. I'm doing what you sent me to do. dese pickens need help. dey forget too easy. I know. I am Rickydoc. I did not come tru de tunnel. I did not pass tru a woman's legs. I am. Rickydoc. here to teech de young and bring'em home. But for to pass, dey suffer, but from de suffering, dey remember. you will have it so. (bowing down to the ground) O orisha mi o. Modupe. Ashe.
BLACKOUT
(END OF SCENE 1.)

SCENE 2
DAY 2-OUT OF SYNCHRONICITY

(Same yard, the next day. It is once again deep night. Lights focus center stage to reveal a woman's figure, sitting with her back against the well, facing us, her head bowled over in silent sobs. The back of her dress is unbuttoned, so that her bare back is in direct contact with the well.

Moment.

She looks up, it is DORCAS, her face is contorted in some mixture of pain, rage, confusion and so on. After a few moments, she shifts so that more of her back will be contacting the well, there is a minute indication of relief in her features. If at any point we gain sight of her back, we'll see deep welts, old and fresh.

Moment)

DORCAS
(seething, between clenched teeth)
“he that know'th his master's will and doeth it not, shall be beat'n with many stripes.” OOH! (she raises her clenched fists to her teeth and bites looking around.) Why? … I can't take this, lawd knows, I have a good mind ta jump in this well and end it right here, (she looks behind her at the well, contemplates it.) Many gone before, certainly won't be the last one…

(She sits on the edge of the well, and drops her upper body into it, her legs suspending her from fully dropping in. Moment of her suspension. She makes sounds in the well which we hear as hollow/echoed.

Moment.

Suddenly she pulls up)

DORCAS (CONT'D)
lawd that cool feels good.

(She sits back at the bottom of the well, mumbling to herself. Moment. We hear slow footsteps approaching us from the big house. A solitary figure approaches the yard, moving drunkenly. It is Luke. His line of vision stumbles upon the well, and immediately takes notice. He enters behind Dorcas, encroaching on her space.)

LUKE
(hoarsely)
Hey girlie, wanna spend some time tonight? (DORCAS stands up, but not facing him)

DORCAS
(sharp intake of breath) Let me go

LUKE
I see you tall. I like you tall ones (from behind grabs her to him)

DORCAS
I'll scream

LUKE
Go head. Scream. ain't nobody hear you or care for that matter. you mine and I intend to have you.

DORCAS
if you don't let me go, I kill you. I don't play that...

LUKE
Feisty! I like that. (they struggle, LUKE is very much behind DORCAS, throughout their entire struggle, she does not turn around, neither does she see him.)

LUKE (CONT'D)
I'll feed your fire in my bed.

DORCAS
let me g... (he covers her mouth with his hand, still holding on to her with his other hand. She bites him. He quickly removes his hand.)

DORCAS (CONT'D)
let me go.
(he slaps her in the back of her neck with his bitten hand, he swings her around to face him, grabs both of her hands, and forces his kiss on her. DORCAS'S eyes openly glaring at him through out the kiss. As he kisses her, enter Grace, from the direction of the big house. she is unnoticed by either one.)

GRACE
Massa Luke, you out here? Massa Luke Massa sent me out here to...(she sees the two, Luke still kissing Dorcas) whoa! (a quick gasp for air, then rushes off unnoticed by either one.)

(The kiss extends a little longer. Luke stops when Dorcas doesn't respond. He examines her, the gaze is at first questioning. Then recognition)

LUKE
Dorcas? Dorcas is that you?

DORCAS
(stunned)
you ain't...

LUKE
Don't you recognize me? It's Luke.

DORCAS
(stunned)
Luke?

LUKE
I've been looking for you. you haven't changed, always by this well...

DORCAS
(angry)
Don't EVER come up on me like that again. Or any other gal. I thot you knew better. Only your daddy would have done sech a thing, or stupid Rufus.

LUKE
You're not happy to see me? The other darkies were, they see me, they say “Welcome back, Massa Luke, sho nuff good to see you again.” all smiling and grinning, they crowd around me so happy you'd swear I was one of you all

DORCAS
well you ain't.You still master and we still slaves

LUKE
how now Dorcas, why are you being like that? Didn't you miss me?(Dorcas sucks her teeth venomously)

LUKE (cont'd)
well I missed you. I missed you something terrible.

DORCAS
I'm leaving.

LUKE
wait…alright I'm sorry. I didn't know that was you. I thought you was some other...

DORCAS
shouldn't matter.

LUKE
how now Dorcas, I was just lonely, needed some distraction. That's all. I wasn't going to force, I stopped when-the situation just got away from me, that's all. You didn't make it any easier

DORCAS
what? I'm supposed to make it easier for you? oh Luke you...

(LUKE kneels to DORCAS)

LUKE
Dorcas I'm sorry, please forgive me

DORCAS
I don't know. (pause) you anymore

(LUKE gets up)

LUKE
I'm still the same. I've never changed, more of a man, that's all

DORCAS
The Luke that I know would never pounce up on me in the-

LUKE
I SAID I WAS SORRY! That was a mistake, that's all. I see Rufus do it every night, I just wanted to try it once

DORCAS
well, stop copying the likesa Rufus. (venomously) You coulda been killed tonight. (turning to leave) Bye Luke.

LUKE
Dorcas, wait

DORCAS
What for?

LUKE
for what we shared. (pulls out a letter from the inner folding of his breast pocket, holds it out to her.) Remember this? (opens the letter, reads from it) “I think I'm falling in love with you. I'm sure it's coming out of my selfish desire to love someone and have that they love me back. I want to love you for who you are, not what you could be.” your words Dorcas

DORCAS
(with slightly embarrassed recognition) you still have that?

LUKE
Still keep it right in front of my heart. It's what gets me going since I've been back. That and that I'll see you again, and here you are. (pause) Do you want to read it?

DORCAS
What for? I wrote it, I know what it says

LUKE
Just thought it might remind you how special it was that we-

DORCAS
Don't need a billet doux to remind me how I felt, I remember good enough

LUKE
I still feel the same.

DORCAS
Now, you're talking crazy

LUKE
You don't feel anything Dorcas? about us, about this? (pointing to the letter, reading from it) “I think that no matter what, you're amazing, I'm going to list the things I love about you,” (no longer reading) and then you list all these things, and then you say Darling, you called me darling, you say Darling, you are dear, and all the things I've listed come out of a love for you which will never change. That was only five years ago Dorcas, what changed?

DORCAS
I feel. I feel. I still have your letter you know. Have it right here (touches chest) I feel so many things Luke, I don't know...

LUKE
It's really funny cause in school, we've had to read about the abolitionists and anti-abolitionists and how-oh you know the abolitionists are

DORCAS
I know who the abolitionists are

LUKE
Forgive me, sometimes I forget. (pause) there's this professor came to school, one Thomas Dew, said niggers were the happiest folks on earth, He said they were happier than us because I don't know why. I guess you don't bear the burden of the world like we do. Is that true, are you happy all the time? Happier than me even?

DORCAS
What for are you asking me this stupid question? Insult!

LUKE
You always tell the truth Dorcas, to me you always tell me the truth and I don't know anymore. I don't know what to think, I need someone to tell me the truth. Mother wants me to marry and take over-

DORCAS
It has to come from you Luke, the truth? Listen to you. You know the right thing, I can't tell you.

LUKE
(impetuously)
When he said that, I thought if all you feel is happy, then how do I... you're not like anybody else Dorcas, you not like any of the other girls or the other darkies. Dorcas, will you marry me?

DORCAS
WHAT? … What for? What kinda talk is-

LUKE
That's it!! Mama is trying to get me to marry. She's shoving all these girls up my throat and I can't stand it one bit one word out of any of their mouths and you'd swear they have flowers for brains not like you, you you talk to me, you never lie, you never pretend to be something you're not, you're strong you...

DORCAS
You crazy or just plain DUMB? Niggas cain't get married, it's in your LAWS, read it sometime. sides you ever seen a slave and her master married?

LUKE
I read those laws same as you. I got you the books remember? But there's nothing in there that says we can't make our own laws. We could run away, from all of this. We don't have to cater to them. Now I know you...

DORCAS
I LIVE in this world that your laws rules over, and while I'm still part of this world I have to obey your laws. Massa will not make me forget. Now HUSH UP with all that marriage talk. What for you want mess good thing up?

LUKE
Dorcas, we don't have to live in this world. You yourself said it, I want to live a life without fear, and I'm offering it to you now, what you've wanted, your ideal, I'm here, take me now, don't go back on your word, we can live our own lives in FREEDOM!

DORCAS
HUSH UP. That was long ago, I was naïve. You say you've grown, become a man but you still don't know your place in the world. I am not about to DIE because of you. I've learned my place (walking away) you betta learn yours

LUKE
Dorcas wait!

DORCAS
(Walking)
There ain't nothing more ta say.

LUKE
If you go, at least take this. (holds out pieces of cloth) now, I don't know if you're still making it, but I thought of you-

DORCAS
(looking back) You still remember?

LUKE
You're still at it? For how long? When will it be done?

DORCAS
Quilts takes a long time.

LUKE
Can I see it?

DORCAS
Not tonight

LUKE
Why not? it's for me isn't it?

DORCAS
No.

LUKE
Who is it for then? Where are my clothes going? (suspicious) it's not another man is it? Ha! A negro? Are you leaving me for a Negro?

DORCAS
(smiling) You'll see. This is gonna be even more special cause it's from you. Thank you.

(She hugs him, he doesn't hug her back. She stiffens in the hug. He pulls away)

LUKE
Why won't you marry me?

DORCAS
(sigh)I know you're going through a lot, and the world you know is crumbling down, and you trying ta find your place, where you stand with all this. But listen and watch...

Hear what your mama refuses to hear, see what your daddy cain't see. and the change you looking for, you'll find it. At your heart is a good boy, a good boy. But you're still a boy. You don't have to run. you stay here. There is a war here that you have to fight, you stay in the thick of the war and you'll be a better man than your daddy was. (Kissing him one last time) I hold you here.

LUKE
I don't understand, but I know you speak the truth. If your wisdom at this moment were something I could hold and remember and pull out and gaze upon later, I'd put it in my treasure box, along with the very first rose you gave me.

DORCAS
That rose is long dead now

LUKE
I still keep it, for what it symbolizes is not dead. We are not dead.

DORCAS
Yes we are, we have to be. Goodbye. (Dorcas runs off in the direction of the slave quarters. Luke reaches for her wispily)

LUKE
Dorcas don't leave. We are not dead. Please don't leave me now. (Pause. speaking to the letter) I don't want to be like him. But I don't know. What other way is there to be? You said not to repress feelings, why are you repressing mine? Dorcas, tell me what to do. Why are you taking away my one anchor? (Rakes his hair) If you marry me, I get out. I get to be me, I want to be me, but you won't, Why? I don't know. Tell me Dorcas. (Pause for an answer.)
(He sighs. Puts letter away.)
FADEOUT
END OF SCENE 2

Continued next issue...

 

© 2005 by Omotayo Jolaosho